Reg's Reckoning
The following takes place following: Before the Storm
Resources arrive from Guthrie Govan, including troops and artillery; Mr. Teeth’s Uruk-hai; Humungus’ vehicles and bandits; and medical supplies from Dr. Larry Fraser.
Kaz:: I reckon the best tactic is to move straight toward the palace city walls. Hildendorf’s Skunkbreed army is locked in a stalemate on the western edge. Some have resorted to self-destruction by controlled detonation. I say we flank around the eastern edge and try to breach the walls.
Master Devlin: Once we gain access to the palace, I don’t know what to expect. I have no idea how much Delacroix Vincent has infested Van Der Beak at this point—or whether Reg just keeps him as a pet.
Travers: Good idea. I'll stay behind and keep an eye on the estate.
Everyone: 😒
Two hours later… The coalition army assembles, their ranks bolstered by allies, and begins the march toward Van Der Beak’s palace—the final battleground.
Along the way, Otacon’s battle gear breaks down. He and a small squad pull over to make rapid repairs.
The rest of the army pushes forward.
Eventually, the palace comes into view—they draw closer and closer. Suddenly, Van Der Beak’s defensive forces open fire. Vehicles are destroyed, troops are blown apart. They pull back, take cover, and begin laying down suppressing fire on the walls and ground positions.
Reg sends out a demonic army— the allied troops engage in melee combat.
The Master, Kaz, and Wesley slice through demons with silver swords. Goblin Slayer pulverizes them with his massive silver claymore.
Revy darts through the chaos, dual-wielding pistols, picking off demons.
Fire rains down from the wall, forcing the Master to take cover behind wreckage. He glances down and notices Travers hiding.
Travers: Helloo, Master Devlin.
Master Devlin: Travers, what are you doing here?
Travers: Well… I...Thought I might come lend a hand.
Master Devlin: By hiding behind this burnt-out car?
Travers: Precisely! I’m not getting my oil changes at the mansion, so I came here.
Master Devlin: Fine, just don’t get yourself shot, stabbed, or blown up—there’s enough of that going on.
The battle continues, but just like Hildendorf’s army, they too hit a stalemate.
The Master spots the last of his cult followers waddling into a hidden corridor in the wall before vanishing inside.
Suddenly… a massive explosion rocks the battlefield—a huge chunk of the wall is blown wide open. Many of Van Der Beak’s troops are thrown from the battlements.
A horde of demonic forces surges through the exposed gap. The allied troops brace for impact—but before the demons can engage, they are ripped apart by a hail of gunfire.
Then, a thunderous roar echoes across the battlefield—Otacon’s battle tank announces its arrival.
The tank fires, blasting a colossal hole in the wall—the vehicle pushes through, clearing a path.
The army charges through, using the battle tank for cover. Travers hops onto the Master’s back.
The Master notices that Travers is… excited. He grimaces in disgust as he feels "Travers Junior" pressing into his shoulder.
Master Devlin: Travers, what’s the matter with you?
Travers: Nooo, Master Devlin. The real question is—what’s the matter with you?
Master Devlin: WHAT?? 🤨
Travers: Never mind…
They press on, moving through the city toward a giant bird statue atop the palace.
The battle tank continues its rampage, demolishing Reg’s forces—but eventually, it breaks down again.
The troops push forward, fighting their way up the palace stairs.
Master Devlin: A platoon will secure the outside. A squad led by Kaz and I will breach the palace.
They step into the palace. Thelonious stands before them, gripping a massive axe, his stance unwavering.
Goblin Slayer: Go on ahead. This fight is mine.
The Master, Travers, and the others press deeper into the palace, avoiding Thelonious and his conflict with Goblin Slayer.
Inside, they fight off palace henchmen, pushing toward the main keep.
Finally, they reach the Great Hall—an ancient Egyptian-styled chamber, covered in strange hieroglyphs.
At the far end, Pharaoh Khufu Van Der Beak sits fuming on his throne. Stanbot 2.0 is being used as a footstool.
Reg: Outrageous! How did you get past Thelonious? I shall be sure to give him a good pecking for this failure!
Suddenly, Thelonious’ severed head rolls across the floor—Goblin Slayer emerges from the shadows behind the group.
Reg stares in horror, his fury quickly overtaking his shock.
He leaps from his throne, kicking aside the weak Stanbot. He storms toward the Master, beak ready to attack.
The Master grabs a shotgun from one of the others—he fires, blasting off Reg’s foot. The same one he was once forced to kiss.
Reg crashes to the ground, screaming in agony.
Reg: Arrgghhh… DEVLIN, YOU MOTHERFUCKER! I’LL GET YOU FOR THIS! I WILL KILL YOU!
Master Devlin: Reginald Van Der Beak… or Dr. Drabak… or whatever they call you—your reign of terror is at an end.
Reg: Arrgghh… It wasn’t me! I had nothing to do with this! It was him… the lutin…
****
The Master feels momentarily satisfied, but as he looks around at the others, uncertainty creeps in—what now?
Across the hall, he spots Ed, standing impatiently, checking his watch.
The Master shoots Ed a look, silently asking, "What now?" Ed merely shrugs.
The Co-Editor, invisible to everyone else—appears next to Ed.
Cody: I was hoping you’d take a turn to contribute. I’m not really sure where to go with this. This is your story arc and I wasn’t sure what your intentions were...
Ed: Meh… I have no ideas. Just keep going.
Cody: Must you be so lazy?
Ed: I’m on holiday… Let’s just wrap it up, shall we? I’ve had enough of this arc.
Cody: Fine. Um…
Suddenly, Mr. Vincent emerges—materializing from Reg’s amulet.
Vincent: Ahhh, Master Devlin—how delightful of you to drop by. And my old protégé, Mr. Waldo. Hmm… you appear to have a funny moustache…
Travers slithers into view, creeping around the Master’s head, settling on his shoulder.
Travers: Harris Travers, attorney at law. Will you be requiring legal assistance?
Master Devlin: It’s over, Mr. Vincent. You’re defeated.
Vincent: I decide when it’s over. Do you really think it stops here? Come now, Do you think this pathetic tranny bird could have taken control of Waldonia so quickly without me?
Reg whimpers, collapsed on the ground.
Vincent: How is your precious Miss Ermintrude, by the way?
Goblin Slayer tenses, his anger boiling over.
Vincent: It was my idea to take her. I let Thelonious and his boys look after her once I was finished with her. I got my twisty bits in there, I assure you.
Goblin Slayer lunges forward, shoving others aside in his rush toward Vincent. He swings his claymore high, bringing it down through Vincent’s spectral form.
Mr. Vincent laughs, completely unaffected by the attack.
Vincent: Ha ha ha ha… Such rage, such desperation—yet utterly meaningless! Strike all you wish, Sir Knight. Neither steel nor silver can fell me. I will endure… ever present to haunt the girl’s dreams.
Vincent chuckles, his voice reverberating, filling the chamber with a haunting resonance.
As he speaks, Reg’s amulet pulses, its sickly glow intensifying, flickering in rhythm with Vincent’s presence.
The Master’s gaze sharpens—his expression hardens as realization dawns.
Master Devlin: How about a boot?
Without hesitation, he drives his boot down onto the amulet.
A powerful shockwave erupts, blasting everyone away—they crash to the ground as windows shatter from the force.
The spectral form of Mr. Vincent dissolves, fading into a dark mist.
Vincent: Well played, Master Devlin… Till we meet again…
The dust settles.
Master Devlin: Well, I suppose that leaves the matter of you, Mr. Van Der Beak…
Reg: That is Pharaoh Khufu Van Der Beak, Devlin.
Master Devlin: No… no, it isn’t, Reg. You are nothing more than mere office equipment—nothing more.
He pauses, glancing down at the mess beneath Reg.
Master Devlin: I could beat the miserable piss out of you—but it appears you’ve already relieved yourself on the floor.
The Master straightens, staring down at Reg.
Master Devlin: I think it’s best we let the court of public opinion decide.
Travers: Noooo, Master Devlin—it is you who is speaking out of turn! Mr. Van Der Beak is entitled to legal representation from me, national treasure and upstanding goblin of impeccable character… Harris Travers, Attorney at Law!
Master Devlin: Travers, are you happy to represent this bird? The very one who outlawed and denied you your frequent oil changes under a royal decree? The same bird who forced you to seek those oil changes from a pair of unsanitary and unsavory gypsies—which resulted in you contracting an unhealthy dose of gypsy syphilis?
And as such, you haven’t received an oil change since?
Travers: 😮 Ohh… yess… umm, right, right... well then, I think it should be the decision of the other factions.
Reg: You fools—the people love me! You’ll see!
Master Devlin: Really? Is that so? Well, in that case… you have nothing to worry about.
The Master picks up Reg. Bits of his outfit begin to fall away, his elaborate disguise unraveling—revealing the classic Reg beneath.
They reach the front of the palace, where a huge crowd waits.
The moment Reg is spotted, the boos erupt—the people jeer and curse, their anger palpable.
Reg: Unhand me, Devlin, you motherfucker! You will put me down this instance!
Master Devlin: Sure thing.
He drops Reg.
Reg collides with the stone palace stairs, tumbling downward in an awkward, painful descent.
Reg crashes at the bottom—battered, bruised, and humiliated.
The crowd looks on.
Near where Reg lies, a podium stands, untouched.
Master Devlin: Citizens—I am glad to say you are now liberated. The reign of terror under Van Der Beak's regime is officially over!
The crowd erupts into cheers—Van Der Beak statues are pulled down, their faces defaced.
Just as the celebration builds, Travers swoops in.
Travers: Yes, yes, thank you, Master Devlin—I shall take it from here!
Master Devlin: 😠
Travers: Hello, I am Harris Travers—Attorney at Law, National Treasure, War Hero, and now… as you’ll no doubt be aware, I am seeking mayoral office in this fine city. As the liberator of Widdlington—with, of course, some assistance from my associates here, I am hoping I can count on you all for your vote. Thank you!
Citizens: … (crickets chirping)
The crowd—exhausted, injured, malnourished—does not appear amused by Travers’ premature attempt at political point-scoring.
The Master grabs Travers, pulling him off the podium.
Master Devlin: Get off of there. This is not the time for one of your charades. They see right through what a charlatan you are.
Travers: Nooo, Master Devlin—it is you who is speaking…
The Master cuts him off—his voice booming.
Master Devlin: SILENCE.
They haul Reg’s broken body back up the stairs.
Master Devlin: Call on the other factions.
****
Sometime Later
A council meeting convenes—Reg, gagged and caged, sits at the center of a round table.
Sayuki Sing Kang and Goldenstein didn’t show up.
Hildendorf: Execute him! Van Der Beak bombed part of Waldeo Drive. A Dior and Burberry shop were… were… they have perished…
Tess starts to tear up.
Humungus: Van Der Beak never delivered on his promise of gasoline. He kept telling me to walk away, just walk away whenever I asked about it. That is my line. Nobody uses my line! I say we kill him.
Dr. Larry: I’m a doctor, and I don’t condone killing anyone. So it’s a no from me.
Guthrie Govan: None of you provided me with sandwiches. So none of you are getting my vote.
Master Devlin: I’m sorry, Guthrie. Here…
The Master slides a lunchbox of sandwiches toward Guthrie.
Guthrie: Well, that’s a start. But still no vote.
Master Devlin: Hrmm. Fine.
Mr. Teeth: I have no reason to wish for the death of this bird. He is no longer a threat.
Master Devlin: You are aware this is the second time Reg has done this? Created a dystopian empire?
Mr. Teeth: Hmm… no, I wasn’t aware. Must’ve been on holiday then. But regardless—I don’t care. Just lock him up.
Travers: Well, I think Mr. Van Der Beak deserves legal representation… from me… Harris Travers.
Master Devlin: The purpose of this forum is to decide his fate. At this point, he has lost the right to a trial.
Travers: Prison then… I don’t care. I’m running for mayor.
After a short deliberation, it is decided—Reginald Van Der Beak will be locked away in Waldgate Maximum Security Prison to serve a life sentence.
With the amulet shattered and his minions defeated, Nilbog the Corruptor’s grip on Waldonia begins to unravel. His influence fades, retreating like a dying shadow. The skies, once choked with his presence, clear—daylight returning to the realm at last.
Life in Widdlington begins to return to normal—or at least, to what one might consider "normal" for Widdlington.
The Master is back at his council offices in Waldobury.
Kaz and Frakes lounge outside near the chemical burger van.
Waldo rests in his dumpster.
Mayuri, now fully recovered, settles back into her home on the council grounds.
Goblin Slayer and Ermintrude are offered accommodation at the council while they decide their next steps.
Meanwhile, Revy hits the road—no plans, no destination. Just looking for more trouble to get into.
The Master looks outside, embracing the warm sunlight breaking through his office window—before his attention shifts.
A van pulls up outside the council gates—two men begin attaching a banner.
The Master steps outside, watching as they drive away.
He glances up at the banner.
"Harris Travers for Mayor, Hero and Liberator of Widdlington"
End of Season
The Waldoverse Contiues in Season 6: Traps, Trebuchets & National Treasures