Rebels on the Run

The following takes place following: Where Briefcases Dare

Travers: Yes, it’s me. Emperor Travers! National treasure... I must say, I’m surprised—and a little disappointed—that you’d come here of all places, and so soon... so obvious! By the way, how’d you like my prerecorded Traverscast?

Travers does the Revolver Ocelot meow thing as a dozen Travers Troopers storm the building, rifles drawn on the fugitives.

Master Devlin: Goddammit, Travers, what is it you want? Absolute power? Why are you here?

Travers: I’m here for you, my friend. I miss you. Also, I can’t have rebellions popping up in doctor’s offices... it just isn’t right. Treason carries the death penalty in the Empire, y’know. But I’ll tell you what—agree to come home with me, Master Devlin, and I give you my word your friends won’t be harmed... maybe deported though...

Master Devlin: You’ve allowed greed to twist your mind. And now you’ve become the very thing you swore to destroy.

Travers: Ha ha ha... I don’t recall swearing to destroy anything... Where do you get these fanciful ideas? I told you before, this town needs an enema. And this is how to do it.

Wesley: We’ll see about that...

Wesley pulls out a handgun and points it at Travers.

EMH: Gentlemen, please... This is a doctor’s office, not a soccer match!

Travers: What are you planning to do with that? Shoot me? Ha ha ha. I’m a goblin, you limey fool... Bullets don’t do squat.

Wesley turns to the EMH.

Wesley: Apologies for the mess...

EMH: Mess? What mess?

In Lethal Weapon 2 style, Wesley fires at the Master’s fish tank. The crashing water floods the room, catching the troopers off guard and washing Travers out the front door. Wesley quickly grabs Master Devlin and dashes for the back exit as Goblin Slayer swings his sword wildly, chopping off limbs before following them into the alley.

A tense, Half-Life 2-style chase ensues as our heroes flee through winding alleys and backstreets, with Travers’ troopers and large aerial attack vehicles hot on their heels, causing considerable property damage.

They finally lose their pursuers down in the canals by the River Waldo. Taking shelter beneath the waterfront docks out the back of WF’s Exotic Animal Emporium, the group pauses to plan their next move. Sirens blare as they watch aerial vehicles scanning the area.

Wesley: We have to warn Master Miller. Travers will no doubt have him arrested—because of me.

Wesley notices his hands are covered in ink.

Master Devlin: I do apologize... I had a little accident.

Wesley: It’s quite alright. These things happen.

Goblin Slayer: We should split up. I’ll find Miller.

Wesley: Alright. Well first we must go retrieve Mayuri, then we’ll try to recruit some allies. I suggest you have Miller do the same. We should meet up later… any ideas, Master Devlin?

Master Devlin: I’d have suggested the Council Grounds — technically outside Travers’ jurisdiction — but that won’t stop him. I’m sure his troops have already annexed it. I’ll have to return there eventually, once I’m myself again. In the meantime… what about Travers’ old law office? Last place he’d expect.

Wesley: Yes, good idea. Not far from the Council. Do you know where it is, Goblin Slayer?

Goblin Slayer: Yes.

Wesley: Good. Well then, see you there.

Goblin Slayer nods and head off.

Wesley: Right then. Let’s go.

****

Wesley and the Master stealthily make their way back to Wesley’s home. Hiding across the street, they survey the area. A Travers Trooper vehicle is parked outside. Wesley’s face falls as the door opens and a trooper carries Mayuri out of the house, down the steps, and loads her into the truck.

Wesley: Those bastards... we’re too late.

Master Devlin: Can we take them? There are only three of them.

Wesley: Yes but they’re also armed with fully automatic rifles. (He checks his magazine.) I’ve got... seven rounds left. And you’re still an octopus. Mayuri could get hurt.

Master Devlin: We can take them quietly. I can choke them out... or suffocate them.

Wesley: If you’re sure you can handle it... alright.

The Master scuttles across the cobblestone street, slipping beneath the parked troop truck and vanishing into the shadows.

One trooper stands guard outside Wesley’s house, while another hauls Mayuri’s wheelchair down the steps, carefully loading it into the back of the truck. Inside, a third trooper rummages through Wesley’s belongings.

Wesley edges cautiously down the street alongside the row of old Victorian terraces, keeping low behind the narrow front gardens and hedges. With the truck now blocking the troopers' view, he crouches at its rear and peeks around.

Spotting Wesley in position, the Master lets out a loud, wet fart from beneath the truck — then instantly melts into goo form and seeps into the cracks. The two troopers lean down to investigate the sound, baffled.

Seizing the moment, Wesley slips around the truck and grabs the nearest trooper in a chokehold. The second turns in surprise — only to be caught by the Master, who erupts from beneath the vehicle and coils his tentacles around the trooper’s neck. Both are swiftly rendered unconscious.

Just then, the third trooper emerges from the house, dropping a box of confiscated items as he sees the ambush. He draws his weapon, but the Master lunges, slamming him backward and impaling him on the spiked railings of Wesley’s front steps. His muffled cry is short-lived.

Wesley and the Master rush into the truck to check on Mayuri. Wesley removes her gag and bindings, and they embrace tightly. He then pulls the wheelchair out from the back of the truck, sets it on the pavement, then lifts Mayuri down and gently settles her into it.

Suddenly, they’re blindsided by a fourth trooper they’d missed — likely upstairs in the house. He kicks the Master across the street, knocks Wesley to the ground, and grabs hold of Mayuri. Still on the ground, Wesley immediately draws his gun, but the trooper is also armed and already aiming. He barks orders for them to drop their weapons. When they don’t comply, he begins to turn his aim toward Mayuri. Without hesitation, Wesley double-taps two rounds into the trooper’s head. He drops like a rock.

Wesley rushes to comfort Mayuri, who’s shaken but unharmed.

Master Devlin: Someone might’ve heard that. We need to move. Is there anything useful in the house?

Wesley: I’ve got an old book of incantations. It might help.

Master Devlin: Good. Grab it — and take one of their assault rifles.

While Wesley disappears inside, the Master drags the bodies into the truck and slams the door shut.

Wesley returns, slinging a rifle over his shoulder and handing the book to Mayuri. The Master hops onto her lap, and she absently strokes his head like a loyal service squid. Wesley begins pushing the wheelchair briskly down the street.

The three of them disappear into the distance, headed for Travers’ old law firm.

****

A couple of blocks from TTS, they stop just off one of the busier streets when one of the huge Traverscast screens comes to life and Travers' face appears. Everyone on the street stops and stares up at the screen.

Traverscast: I'd like to now send another message directly to my old friend who is still currently on the lam... Master Devlin, why are you doing this? I implore you to reconsider this course of action you have embarked upon. You may have had a temporary victory today, but you are simply delaying the inevitable. I have the entire Travers Trooper force of 70,000 strong and a winged beast at my disposal. What do you have? A failed Master, a crippled girl, and some meathead in a metal costume... You can't possibly think you're going to win...

It is only a matter of time before you and the other traitors are brought to swift justice. Unless... unless you give up this foolish campaign... You could have had it all as my right-hand man... Instead, you chose to smash it all... However, I will still show you the most magnanimous mercy if you surrender now. If not, well... then perhaps the national dish will wind up being calamari...

Master Devlin (muttering): Calamari is squid, you arsehole...

Traverscast: That is all... Goodnight, and Ed bless the Waldonian Empire. And Ed bless me, your faithful and humble Emperor and national treasure... Mr Travers...

Wesley: Well, one thing Travers certainly seems to have in common with Widdle Frunkut is his obsession with you...

Master Devlin: Yes, well, the current Travers is just a graft of Widdle Frunkut. So it’s the same genetics… if that at all applies in goblin science. But yes, you’re correct — they both have an unhealthy obsession. Anyway, let's go. It's not far now.

Season 7 continues in Beauty & The Beast