Dr Drabak's Request

The following takes place immediately following: Dr Drabak

Kaz Miller retrieves his burger van and parks it on the campus grounds beside a cluster of outdoor tables and benches, shaded by tall, leafy trees. As he fires up the grill to prepare his infamous chemical burgers, Master Devlin and Waldo settle in at a table with Dr. Evangeline Drabak, the parapsychologist eager to probe their minds.

Master Devlin: So... Dr Drabak. What would you like to discuss?

Eva: Oh, please, call me Eva. That's what everyone calls me. I wish to discuss... Lutin. If the stories are true, you are one of the few in recorded history to defeat one...

wF: Pah! Lutins? Nonsense... silly superstition... Why, there hasn't been a lutin around these parts for over a thousand years!

Eva: But... the archives mention an attack here not too long ago. Multiple sightings—a mass poisoning!

MD: Ignore him. He's a bloody fool, easily swayed by Lutin influence. But yes, they are real, and there was an attack here. I encountered one myself—he went by the name Delacroix Vincent. He’d visit my quarters, offering milk and tea.

Eva: Yes, that corresponds with what I read in the archives... But nowhere else. I can’t find anything more about that particular lutin. I will say, the name Delacroix seems apt. They are said to be of French origin. You didn't drink his milk, did you?

MD: I did, but it had no effect on me. However, Widdle Frunkut also drank it and fell under his influence. Then came the poisoning—the deaths. We fought back and destroyed the Lutin. I think. But we can’t be certain.

Eva: The archives don’t say how the Lutin was defeated. Was there anything not in the records?

MD: A robot named Stanbot 1.0 punched his fist through its skull. I then tossed the carcass in the bin. …Stanbot!? Oh dear, I just realised—we forgot about Stanbot 2.0. He was kidnapped and has been missing, you see...

wF: Forget it, Stan. It's the Waldoverse. Let's just move on...

MD: Hrmm... Well, I suppose we don't really have any reliable leads... He'll turn up eventually...

Eva: Interesting... So the Lutin was in physical form at the time?

MD: Yes.

Eva: Then it must have been quite powerful. I’m afraid I don’t think your robot killed it. There's a popular misconception that Lutin are basically just goblins. While there is some similarity in likeness, I believe they are in fact much closer to spectres. Ghosts.

They rarely achieve corporeal form—and only when at their most powerful. They feed on fear and can manipulate corporeal beings through telekinetic influence. This carnage leads to more fear, which makes them stronger.

Kaz arrives at the table, holding a tray.

Kaz: Here we go—three chemical burgers, on the house! Bon appétit!

Eva studies the burgers with curiosity, peering through her large glasses with intensity.

Eva: Oh my... What colour is that?

Waldo wolfs his down in one gulp.

Kaz: We’re not really sure... My advice is don’t think about it. Just go ahead and bite...

Eva: "Hmmm mmm. Oh my..."

Kaz: Right? Amazing, aren't they?

Eva: Yes, quite... You can really taste the additives...

Kaz sighs with satisfaction. Then he notices the Master staring off, wide-eyed and silent.

Kaz: What’s with him?

wF: Fugue state. He does that sometimes. Just have to wait it out. Well, he’ll probably be a while. No point letting this get cold.

Waldo grabs the Master’s burger and devours it.

wF: Mmm tasty 😛

Kaz: How about a side of chicken wings?

wF: YES PLEASE!

Eva: Oh no, thanks. I never eat... chicken. Or any kind of bird, actually. I rarely eat meat at all—except fish. Though I must say, this burger really is something...

She finishes hers, then glances anxiously at Waldo.

Eva: How long do these fugue states last? I was really hoping to talk to the Master.

wF: Varies. Sometimes minutes, sometimes days. Pretty sure he can hear you though. So you might as well say what you want to say.

Eva: I see... Okay, well...

She shifts in her seat, lowering her voice.

Eva: Like I was saying, I have a particular interest in Lutin. I don’t know if you heard, but an administrator working the late shift at the Council Leisure Centre got spooked by something two nights ago. She posted about it on an internet forum—that’s how I found her. I met her yesterday and everything she said has me convinced it was a Lutin. Better still, I found traces of this.

Eva pulls a vial of shimmering goo from her bag and sets it on the table.

Eva: Ectoplasm. I found it in the corner near her desk.

She leans in, speaking quickly now.

Eva: I think this is only the beginning. I’ve got a prototype device back at my lab that picks up psychokinetic energy—I've been getting crazy readings all over campus, especially around the leisure centre.

I believe this campus acts as a kind of supernatural magnet for entities like Lutin. And I’m going to try to capture one.

wF: Capture a Lutin? Ha! We like you, lady... You’re crazy just like wiffuhuh... Are you sure you don’t want to marry me?

Eva: I’m quite sure, thank you. And I’m also quite serious.

The Master suddenly stirs from his trance, looking down at his now-empty plate.

MD: KAZ! Another burger, please!

Kaz: Coming right up, boss...

MD: Apologies, Doctor. As Widdle Frunkut explained, I have these unfortunate fugue states. It’s quite frustrating—but I heard what you were saying. I must ask... what is your interest in all this? Why would you want to capture a Lutin? I get the feeling this is more than academic curiosity...

Eva hesitates, then exhales slowly.

Eva: Well, I—

wF: Yeah! What’s your angle, lady?? SPEAK!

Eva: I... I had a horrific accident. About six months ago.

She draws herself up, voice trembling.

Eva: I was driving home late from university, through the countryside. I went off the road—and collided with a train. The train derailed. There were several deaths.

I survived—somehow. A miracle... that soon became a nightmare.

I was badly disfigured. I’ve had multiple reconstructive surgeries. Once I was discharged from hospital, I was accused of manslaughter by “dangerous driving.” They claimed I must’ve fallen asleep at the wheel.

No one would believe what actually happened.

She pauses, swallowing hard.

Eva: Ever since, I’ve been stuck in this absurd legal nightmare. Strange hearings. Secret judges. One time I had to stand naked for two hours in a laundromat while four old men inspected me for "marks of the devil" with medieval tools.

My lawyer is no better. He’s... sleazy. Makes me come to his office at all hours and... do things. Things I’d rather not describe. When I challenge him, he just tells me I’m “speaking out of turn.”

wF: Yes, yes, this is all very sexy, but what has this got to do with Lutins?

Eva: Sorry. I was getting to that...

She looks away, composing herself.

Eva: That night... I didn’t fall asleep. Something appeared. A horrible, wrinkled face—right in front of me. I’d never seen it before, but I’ll never forget it. It gave me such a fright I let go of the wheel. Then it turned—on its own—and sent me into the path of the train.

Later, I found that face in Tobin’s Spirit Guide. It was a Lutin. That’s what caused the crash. Ever since, I’ve had a vendetta. I want to catch one. And maybe... just maybe, if I can show it to the court, they’ll acquit me.

MD: Is your lawyer Harris Travers, by any chance?

Eva: Yes! You know him?

Kaz returns with a new burger.

Kaz: Know him? He was best man at his wedding recently...

Eva: WHAT?! I... I can’t believe you’d be friends with such a man...

The Master scowls and looks at Waldo.

MD: I wouldn’t go that far. More of a stand-in... I despise the man. But it’s complicated.

Eva: Oh?

MD: Let me explain...

He pulls a fake moustache from his coat and places it on Waldo.

Travers: Hellooo Master Devlin!... Ah... Dr Drabak! What are you—

The Master yanks it off again.

wF: Who turned out the lights? Stupid pizzazz. Ah gooberfish!

MD: Did I mention Widdle Frunkut is mentally unstable?

Eva: Huh... remarkable... I’ve heard of split personalities before but this...

MD: Indeed. Travers is vile. But Widdle Frunkut is my pupil—and my responsibility.

He places the moustache again.

MD: Travers—what have you been making Dr Drabak do? Why are you torturing this woman?

Travers: Nooo Master Devlin... It is you who is speaking out of turn. Travers is only doing what is in her best interests. I must convince the court she is a compliant citizen.

Eva: Please... I’d rather not go into detail...

The Master removes the moustache again.

MD: Well Kaz, I hope this clarifies why you shouldn’t use him for legal representation.

Kaz: National treasure, huh?

Waldo notices Dr Drabak shifting uncomfortably. He reaches a flipper toward her shoulder to offer comfort.

She winces.

Eva: Please don’t. I don’t want those grubby little hands touching my body again.

MD: Remove your flipper, Waldo. In fact—leave. Right now.

wF: 😡 How wood! Whatever...

He stomps off toward the burger truck.

wF: Kaz! More burgers, please!

Kaz: Right away, boss!

MD: Well, Dr. Drabak, we can get back to the subject of the Lutin shortly, but first of all—I strongly advise you to fire Travers immediately.

Eva: But he says my case will go badly unless I stick with him. Can you guarantee it won’t? I tried to refuse, but I was frightened. Those court goons are very intimidating! He at least pretends to be on my side.

MD: I can guarantee he says that to every client. I don’t know who these judges are, but I doubt he has any real sway with them. He’s not even a real lawyer—just a crook and a con man. He takes advantage of the vulnerable… especially women.

She winces again... sinking into her seat, deflated.

Eva: That... bastard! All those bloody “oil changes,” as he calls them!? I’m so ashamed... It was all for nothing! 😭😤

She suddenly becomes enraged, gets up, and charges to the burger truck, attacking Waldo.

Eva: You little creep! I’ll destroy you!!

wF: Masta! Help!!

Kaz looks on, confused.

She smacks Waldo in the face repeatedly with a greasy spatula, then tries to strangle him.

wF: Lex... Lex, you’re choking me...

After watching with satisfaction for a few seconds, the Master finally intervenes.

ND: Okay, okay—that’s enough now, Doctor. I’m afraid that won’t work.

She tires and lets go. The Master pulls out his trusty spade.

MD: Here... try this spade!

wF: Masta, what the hell are you doing??

She whacks Waldo with it as hard as she can—BONK.

Waldo’s face now has a misshapen, Southern quality to it as he wriggles free.

wF: Crazy bitch! What the hell is wrong with you!?

MD: That was just for my own pleasure. After your attempted sexual assault, I’d say it’s fair. Also—I would say Waldo is the crazy bitch.

wF: 😡 Whatever, man! Waldo is outta here. Have fun with your ugly girlfriend!

Waldo pulls a jetpack out of his pocket, straps it on, launches, and flies away.

MD: I do apologise. He can be quite vile.

Eva: It’s quite alright... I’m sorry too. I just lost my mind a bit.

They sit back down.

MD: Understandable. Well, I can provide the Masters Council’s in-house legal team to see if they can aid you in your case.

Eva: I don’t know what to say... That’s very kind of you.

MD: You’ve been a victim of Widdle Frunkut and his alternate personality, Travers... I think it’s the least we can do.

Eva: Well, thank you... Are you married, Master Devlin?

MD: No... no, madam. I am not. My time dealing with Widdle Frunkut has not allowed for that. He has an abandonment complex—so if I were to get married, there would be a risk to their lives. He would not allow it. Waldo is a parasite I’ve been unable to free myself from.

Eva: That all sounds rather lonely...

Frakes suddenly beams in next to them.

Frakes: Fact of the Day: The character of Delacroix Vincent was named after, and based on, legendary actor Vincent Price. Price would later go on to voice the character in the feature-length animated adaptation of the Lutin arc. The other, more obvious influence was The Grinch and other works of Dr. Seuss. Mr. Vincent was voted #4 in the Top 20 Waldoverse Villains by readers of Goblins Illustrated magazine.

Frakes notices the burger van and, without another word, turns and walks over to it.

Eva: What the...? Who on earth is that?

MD: That’s Jonathan Frakes, reprising his role from the series Beyond Belief: Fact or Fiction. He’s the self-declared Waldoverse fact checker.

Eva: He seemed to know about the Lutin. Perhaps we should try to ask him more questions about—

MD: I wouldn’t bother. He’s a serial bullshitter. Very unreliable...

Eva: It doesn’t sound like you’re a fan?

MD: Widdle Frunkut pays him to jump in and support him with his many lies.

Eva: I see. I’d like to ask you some more questions. Would you care to take a walk?

MD: Very well...

****

The Master and Dr Drabak take a strong across the campus.

Eva: Have you heard of an ancient nordic dragon priest named Ahzidal?

MD: No I haven't. He was an ancient master who was said to have possessed a very powerful amulet that can summon and bind powerful phantom spirits to it. In my research, I believe I may have discovered it's location. If we can find it, we could use it to summon and capture the lutin's soul. But it would also greatly help if we could acquire the physical remains of this Vincent with the amulet and what remains of the corpse, I could perform a ritual that would summon the spirit of Vincent and draw it to the body. We can then trap it with the containment device I've invented. This is where I need your assistance...

MD: What? You want to summon Vincent here? Are you insane woman? How do you know your containment device even works?

Eva: Please Master Devlin, I understand your caution, but i'm quite confident that it will...

MD: There is something else I must add. Ever since Vincent turned up and Waldo drank his tea, Waldo has been having... rare episodes. Displaying traits of a lutin. Widdle Frunkut turned into this during the massacre at the Masters Council. It then happened again not long ago, where myself and Kaz were building an offshore facility. We recruited a number of people. Widdle Frunkut then revealed that he was posing as Kaz, who had never made it to Masterbase. Suffering the effects of the lutin, waldo caused the entire destruction of Masterbase. Luckily Kaz, the real one came to my rescue.

The Master pauses for a second. Eva thinks it's another fugue state but the Master is in fact having a PTSD flashback to the Masterbase incident. Dr Drabak spots Waldo in the distance who is rummaging in the bins. His little jet pack didn't get him very far.

The Master comes back to the present:

MD: Doctor, could there be a part of Delacroix Vincent that lives on in Widdle Frunkut? Is that why there has been strange sightings around the council grounds?

Eva: Master Devlin, I have seen Delacroix Vincent with my own eyes...It matches the drawing in archives perfectly. I can confirm what I suspected all along, which is that he survived the encounter here, and later tried to kill me. And That he is here... somewhere. Now while I can't guarantee you that the containment field will work, I do have a high degree of confidence as I've managed to lock up several troublesome spooks with earlier versions. And I've since been able to improve power and efficiency through modifications. Its all rather technical, I'm afraid...Now let us weigh up the risk vs rewards. If I'm wrong, and Vincent isn't here in Waldobury at all, then we've simply wasted our time, and I've dragged you on a wild goose chase...But I'm correct and he is floating around campus, at least we will know where he is, And we have a chance of trapping him As for Mr Frunkut's mental state, I can't speak too much about that. He certainly seems unstable, but from what you say, that's nothing new.You seem to know how to handle him, so maybe we should keep him close just in case. But no, I don't believe he responsible for the lutin sightings here. I have spent a long time researching the lutin. This is greatly important to me, as I previously explained. I understand your skepticism. But I'm telling you there's good science behind this...You must trust the science. Trust me, Master Devlin. I can't do this without you.

Suddenly, Waldo appears behind them, all covered in dirt.

wF: Masta, can we has some money now? Masta Miller says we has to pay to get anymore chemical burgers... We thinks hes a drug pusher! Giving away free samples to get us hooked...

MD: Widdle Frunkut go get yourself a bath. You're a disgrace. A real bath! No cats...

Waldo huffs and defiantly starts rolling in dirt on the ground.

The Master turns back to Dr Drabak.

MD: Doctor, I am skeptical and I am also nervous... You may have had a glimpse of a lutin during your awful accident. But I've had to battle with Vincent. I have never met a more ruthless foe. If he returns in a physical form, it will be catastrophe...But I will help you. You are right, it would be best to know if he's here...But I also need you to help free Widdle Frunkut of these recurring episodes as a result of lutin poisoning.

Eva: Thank you, Master Devlin. I will do what I can. Well to start... Do you know where we can find Vincent's remains?

Eva watches curiously as Waldo climbs up on the master's head and curls up between his horns.

Waldo rudely sticks his tongue out at her. She doesn't react.

MD: Widdle Frunkut haven't you got anything better to do? The Master places Waldo on the ground. The Master and Dr Drabak take a stroll across the campus.

Eva: Have you heard of an ancient Nordic dragon priest named Ahzidal?

MD: No, I haven't.

Eva: He was an ancient master who possessed a powerful amulet capable of summoning and binding phantom spirits. Through my research, I believe I've discovered its location. If we can find it, we could use it to summon and capture the lutin's soul. However, acquiring the physical remains of Vincent would be greatly beneficial as well. With the amulet and Vincent’s remains, I could perform a ritual to summon his spirit and draw it to the body. We could then trap it with the containment device I've invented. This is where I need your assistance...

MD: What? You want to summon Vincent here? Are you insane, woman? How do you even know your containment device works?

Eva: Please, Master Devlin, I understand your caution, but I'm confident it will...

MD: There is something else I must add. Ever since Vincent appeared and Waldo drank his tea, Waldo has been experiencing rare episodes—displaying traits of a lutin. It led to the massacre at the Masters Council.

It happened again not long ago when Kaz and I were building an offshore facility. We recruited several people, but Widdle Frunkut later revealed that he had been posing as Kaz all along—the real Kaz had never made it to Masterbase. Under the effects of the lutin, Waldo caused the complete destruction of Masterbase. Luckily, the real Kaz came to my rescue.

The Master pauses for a moment. Eva thinks it's another fugue state, but he is actually having a PTSD flashback to the Masterbase incident.

Dr Drabak spots Waldo in the distance, rummaging through the bins. His little jet pack didn't get him very far.

The Master returns to the present.

MD: Doctor, could a part of Delacroix Vincent live on in Widdle Frunkut? Is that why there have been strange sightings around the council grounds? Eva: Master Devlin, I have seen Delacroix Vincent with my own eyes. His appearance matches the archived drawing perfectly. I can confirm what I suspected all along—he survived the encounter here and later tried to kill me. He is still somewhere nearby. While I can't guarantee the containment field will work, I have a high degree of confidence. I've locked up several troublesome spooks with previous versions and have since made improvements in power and efficiency.

MD: How does it work?

Eva: It’s all rather technical, I'm afraid...Now, let’s weigh the risks against the rewards. If I'm wrong and Vincent isn’t here in Waldobury, we've simply wasted our time, and I’ve led you on a wild goose chase. But if I'm correct, and he is floating around campus, we’ll at least know where he is—and we’ll have a chance to trap him. As for Mr Frunkut's mental state, I can't speak too much on that. He certainly seems unstable, but from what you say, that’s nothing new. You seem to know how to handle him, so perhaps we should keep him close—just in case. But no, I don’t believe he is responsible for the lutin sightings here. I’ve spent a long time researching the lutin. This is greatly important to me, as I’ve previously explained. I understand your skepticism. But I’m telling you, there’s good science behind this. You must trust the science. Trust me, Master Devlin. I can’t do this without you.

Suddenly, Waldo appears behind them, covered in dirt.

wF: Masta, can we has some money now? Masta Miller says we has to pay to get more chemical burgers... We thinks he’s a drug pusher! Giving away free samples to get us hooked...

MD: Widdle Frunkut, go get yourself a bath. You’re a disgrace. A real bath! No cats...

Waldo huffs and defiantly rolls in the dirt. The Master turns back to Dr Drabak.

MD: To be honest, Doctor, I am skeptical and nervous... You may have glimpsed a lutin during your accident, but I’ve had to battle Vincent. I have never met a more ruthless foe. If he returns in physical form, it will be catastrophic. But I will help you. You’re right that it would be best to confirm if he’s truly here. However, I also need you to help free Widdle Frunkut from these recurring episodes caused by lutin poisoning.

Eva: Thank you, Master Devlin. I will do what I can. Well, to start—do you know where we can find Vincent's remains?

Eva watches curiously as Waldo climbs onto the Master's head, curling up between his horns. Waldo rudely sticks his tongue out at her. She doesn't react.

MD: Widdle Frunkut, haven’t you got anything better to do?

The Master places Waldo on the ground.

MD: We can try to look, but it was so long ago. After the lutin attack, the Editor had me banished, and 500 years passed... You know what? That isn’t important. Anyway, I lived at the offshore facility for a while before returning to build the new council grounds you see before you. The old grounds have been preserved largely untouched since—so it’s possible there’s an unemptied dumpster lying around somewhere with Vincent's mangled corpse inside. So, if you wish, we can head to the old council grounds and search the bins...

Eva: Oh...um...okay. Yes, let’s go. I’m not above a spot of bin-raiding if it’s for a good cause. Lead the way...

wFw: We’re coming too! You need Widdle Frunkut for this kind of mission... quest... thing... Where are we going?

The story continues in Little Pripyat